Iran to offer space holidays for monkeys

Iran has been accused of creating a smokescreen with it’s highly publicised ‘free of charge galactic monkey holidays’ the first of which happened yesterday. Western Governments have argued that this display of overt monkey kindness may have a sinister ulterior motive and indeed theories have ranged from plans to start a pro-Iranian ‘planet of the apes’ on the moon, to more far fetched accusations that Iran are simply testing long range missiles. However as the first monkey returned, no doubt full of tales for his monkey friends, animal charities world wide have offered their congratulations.

In fact Britains Royal Society for the Protection of Cruelty to Animals was one of the first to publicly offer Iran its full support. A spokesman explained, “It’s not easy being a monkey and that’s why we think every monkey deserves a holiday. In the past most of these holidays have involved all inclusive package holidays or short city breaks. Iran’s decision to offer free space travel really raises the bar. It’s all very commendable.”

President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad gave an emotional speech on the subject to a world wide press conference. “Once again, only Iran cares that monkeys cannot even afford to go abroad on holiday, let alone send themselves out into space. This will be just the first of many lavish monkey holidays. Next year we plan to take more monkeys away on an all expenses paid trip to watch some nuclear tests.”