“We give you independence and look what you do with it” Uk tells USA

Britain would be reticent to offer the USA independence if it asked for it again  according to Government sources.

Trump “London protesters begged me to come to UK”

A group of several hundred thousand protesters thought to be protesting against Donald Trump’s forthcoming UK visit are actually pro-Trump and begged him to come according to a statement issued by the US president this morning.

Free Tommy Robinson whatever he’s done

Former EDL leader Tommy Robinson should be freed irrespective of any crime he’s committed and any crime he might decide to commit in the future according to a select group of very loud gentlemen.

Brexit in doubt as Isle of Wight not included in referendum

The future of Brexit has been called into doubt this morning following revelations that no polling stations were set up on the Isle of Wight during the referendum of June 2016.

NRA leader “Stop calling me Shooty McShootface”

NRA leader Wayne LaPierre has appealed to the world to take the NRA seriously again and stop calling him Shooty McShootface.

Lets not pretend it’s ok to be a Daily Mail Reader

Hi, I’m Richard Littlejohn and as you may have read I’ve just been banned from Centreparcs for being a bigot. But am I? Am I really? Obviously yes but it’s not my fault. It’s yours. And that’s not ok.

Bananas recalled over spider risk

Customers who have bought bananas from any outlet in the past 4 days have been urged today to take them immediately back for a refund as fears grow that they may contain Brazilian Wandering spiders.

The Daily Mail appointed Work and Pensions Secretary

Prime Minister Theresa May has today defended her decision to award the position of Work and Pensions Secretary to the Daily Mail newspaper.

Britain “tricked into making passports colour of the EU flag”

Former UKIP leader Nigel Farage has lambasted the EU today for tricking Britain into changing its passport colour to blue like the EU flag.

Brexiters joy as Britain pays Europe £39 billion that could have gone on NHS

Brexiters throughout Britain are celebrating today that Britain could now save £350 million a week to be spent on the NHS by instead paying £39 billion pounds to Europe that could have gone on the NHS.