Chessington World of Adventures to host free Brexit party

Chessington World of Adventures is to open its doors to Brexiters free of charge on 31st January to celebrate  Britain’s long awaited departure from the EU.

“Thank you for voting Conservative” say FTSE 100 bosses

FTSE 100 Chief Executives have written an open letter to the public thanking them for voting Conservative, as it means they have already earned the national average salary after only going back to work yesterday. 

Johnson “I did it for Brexit”

Boris Johnson didn’t do it. But if he did, he did it for Brexit according to a statement from the Prime Minister.

Labour Government to stay in and leave the EU

A Labour Government would unify the people by both staying in the EU and leaving it.

There won’t be a no deal Brexit recession because laughing smiley face

There won’t be any sort of recession following a no deal Brexit because “laughing smiley face” and “we won get over it”, according to experts.

Peterborough votes for no NHS and fucking expensive holidays

The plucky people of Peterborough have voted decidedly for the abolition of the NHS and for holidays abroad to be even more expensive than they are now.

Autumn dismissed as “project fear”

The season of Autumn has been dismissed as “scaremongering and project fear” according to a number of prominent politicians.

“We give you independence and look what you do with it” Uk tells USA

Britain would be reticent to offer the USA independence if it asked for it again  according to Government sources.

Britain “tricked into making passports colour of the EU flag”

Former UKIP leader Nigel Farage has lambasted the EU today for tricking Britain into changing its passport colour to blue like the EU flag.

Brexiters joy as Britain pays Europe £39 billion that could have gone on NHS

Brexiters throughout Britain are celebrating today that Britain could now save £350 million a week to be spent on the NHS by instead paying £39 billion pounds to Europe that could have gone on the NHS.