UKIP to change name to United Kingdom No MP Party (UKNOMP)

UKIP is to change its name to the United Kingdom No MP party or UKNOMP according to leader Paul Nuttall.

Elephants listening in on Donald Trump with their huge flappy ears

Elephants have been listening in on Donald Trump with their huge flappy ears and most likely handing the information to Barack Obama, the media or British Intelligence, according to tweets published by Mr Trump earlier this morning.

“Now not the time for independence vote” Theresa May tells America

Theresa May has rejected calls for the USA to hold a referendum regarding independence from Britain today saying “now is not the time.”

Trump to keep an open mind about flat earth

The concept of a spherical earth may be misinformation propagated by so called scientists who like the media have a liberal-elitist agenda according to US president Donald Trump.

Richard Madeley urges second EU referendum

A second EU referendum seems far more likely today following an impassioned plea for one by daytime TV personality Richard Madeley.

Hunt “Doctors must be able to fly”

Doctors are to be required to be able to soar through the air like a bird following a new directive from Secretary of State for Health, Jeremy Fucking Hunt

“Corbyn is unelectable” warns actor who played Roland in Grange Hill

Erkan Mustafa who played Roland in early episodes of Grange Hill has today warned that Labour face annihilation under Jeremy Corbyn should Theresa May call a snap election.

“We’re going down the tube and we’re taking you with us” May tells Scotland

Britain is driving off a cliff half-cut and has Scotland locked in the boot, Prime Minister Theresa May has told Scottish Conservatives today.

Penny Mordaunt “Disabled people are taking the piss”

Disabled people are taking the piss and should think twice before being such an awful drain on society, according to Disabilities Minister Penny Mordaunt. Speaking from her constituency office of Portsmouth North where she was unveiling a new set of steps where there had previously been a wheelchair ramp, Ms Mordaunt told us: “Apparently those […]

Corbyn trailing in polls against dalek invasion

Hard working families in Britain would shun labour and instead vote for an invasion by a psychopathic race of fictional alien/machine hybrids, should such an option become available and a general election tomorrow according to polls released today.