FTSE 100 Chief Executives have written an open letter to the public thanking them for voting Conservative, as it means they have already earned the national average salary after only going back to work yesterday.
Theresa May “You can have Spam sandwiches or Shit sandwiches”
September 30, 2018 by Leave a Comment
Prime Minister Theresa May has today warned that anyone shunning her offer of Spam sandwiches for lunch will have to eat shit sandwiches.
Lets not pretend it’s ok to be a Daily Mail Reader
February 17, 2018 by Leave a Comment
Hi, I’m Richard Littlejohn and as you may have read I’ve just been banned from Centreparcs for being a bigot. But am I? Am I really? Obviously yes but it’s not my fault. It’s yours. And that’s not ok.
Conservatives to replace May with some other odious shitbag
October 6, 2017 by 1 Comment
The Conservative party are to replace Prime Minister Theresa May with some other shitbag according to Government sources.
Weak and pissy lager in weaker and pissier than advertised shocker
August 26, 2017 by Leave a Comment
Weak and pissy lager giant Carling has apologised following revelations that their weak and pissy lager is actually weaker and pissier than advertised, shocking all but people who have ever tried it.
Swivel-eyed loons bribe God-bothering homophobes to form isolationist government
June 26, 2017 by Leave a Comment
Austerity-fetishist food bank deniers the conservative party have given some homophobic God-botherers a billion pounds or two to agree with them for four years as Britain makes preparations to unnecessarily withdraw from the worlds biggest single market.
Theresa May to headline Glastonbury on Sunday
June 24, 2017 by 1 Comment
Theresa May is to address Glastonbury revellers at the Pyramid stage on Sunday evening following Jeremy Corbyn’s talk today.
May vows to exact absolute revenge on Labour voters
June 1, 2017 by Leave a Comment
Theresa May is still going to win the General election despite all the recent kerfuffle and she is going to start her term by rounding up Labour voters and sending them to Tory correction centres.
Sun readers somehow furious at Labour plans to tax people earning over 80k
May 29, 2017 by 1 Comment
Sun readers have endorsed their favourite newspaper’s call to arms following Labour plans to tax people earning over £80,000 a year a bit more.
Corbyn refuses to deny being present for 1970s
May 21, 2017 by Leave a Comment
Labour Leader Jeremy Corbyn has refused to deny that he was present for the entire 1970s when the IRA was active, people were more racist and Jim’ll Fix it was on the TV every Saturday.
News Toad 
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