Theresa May is still going to win the General election despite all the recent kerfuffle and she is going to start her term by rounding up Labour voters and sending them to Tory correction centres.
Vote for shit education and no NHS because Corbyn might not launch a nuclear missile
May 30, 2017 by 1 Comment
Prime Minister Theresa May has warned members of the public that they must vote for child poverty, food banks, expensive social care, underfunded education, no NHS and a reduced army and police force as in the event that we are obliterated by a nuclear strike, Prime Minister Corbyn may not launch one back to destroy […]
Corbyn refuses to deny being present for 1970s
May 21, 2017 by Leave a Comment
Labour Leader Jeremy Corbyn has refused to deny that he was present for the entire 1970s when the IRA was active, people were more racist and Jim’ll Fix it was on the TV every Saturday.
Conservatives to be nice to bunnies and kittens and give everyone free cake
May 18, 2017 by 1 Comment
The Conservative party will be lovely to fluffy animals, kiss babies and give everyone a free slice of cake according to their manifesto released this morning.
Conservatives to bring back Jim’ll Fix it
May 9, 2017 by Leave a Comment
The Conservative party will bring back Jim’ll Fix It on BBC1 if re-elected, according to Prime Minister Theresa May.
People unite behind more reliance on food banks and no NHS
May 1, 2017 by 1 Comment
Theresa May looks set to win the forthcoming General election due to the overwhelming popularity of more people needing food banks and her plans to completely dismantle the NHS.
Nuttall “If we don’t get any seats, I’ll change our name to Pookip”
April 28, 2017 by Leave a Comment
UKIP leader Paul Nuttall has today vowed to change the party’s name to Pookip if they fail to win any seats at the forthcoming general election.
May “No TV debate because I’ll look like a shitbag”
April 19, 2017 by Leave a Comment
Prime Minister Theresa May has today ruled out participating in any TV debates before the forthcoming General Election as it might make her look like a tiny bit of a cunt.
Cameron prepares for his last poo at Number 10
May 6, 2015 by Leave a Comment
David Cameron is preparing for what may be his very last poo at number 10 should he be forced out of his Prime Ministerial job and home by Ed Miliband after tomorrow’s general election. According to Downing Street insiders the long tradition of new Prime Ministers having to ‘give it ten minutes’ due to the […]
Conservatives hoping everyone forgets about Iain Duncan Smith
May 5, 2015 by Leave a Comment
The Conservatives are hoping that everyone forgets about Iain Duncan Smith until at least Friday according to a secret report leaked this afternoon by Lib Dem leader Nick Clegg. Speaking to John Humphreys on the today programme Mr Clegg said “I’m not one for tittle tattle but I was told in private that the Tories […]
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