Vote for shit education and no NHS because Corbyn might not launch a nuclear missile

May and Corbyn

Prime Minister Theresa May has warned members of the public that they must vote for child poverty, food banks, expensive social care, underfunded education, no NHS and a reduced army and police force as in the event that we are obliterated by a nuclear strike,  Prime Minister Corbyn may not launch one back to destroy another country as well.

Looking particularly strong and stable Mrs May said “Corbyn cannot be trusted with our defence. In fairness, a nuclear retaliation would not strictly be defence because actual defence would be something that caught the missile and disarmed it or in extreme cases simply lobbed at back at the people who fired it at us. Either way you need to vote for us so we can be even more unpleasant to disabled people.”

Jeremy Corbyn has been widely criticised for his recent interview with Jeremy Paxman where Paxman repeatedly asked him “Will you set off a nuclear bomb now? Right now? Will you start a nuclear war immediately for no apparent reason?”

One member of the studio audience said “It was a car crash interview. He just kept saying it would depend on the circumstances. We need a strong and stable leader who would not just press the button but every button and then steam into Brexit negotiations like a coked up chimpanzee without listening to anyone on either side.

“Corbyn would probably just want to have discussions and find common ground or something.”

 

Comments

  1. 😂😂😂

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