USA threaten North Korea with new Rocky film


The United States have warned North Korean leader Kim Jong-un to cease his nuclear program immediately or they will have no option but to launch a new Rocky film.

The last time a Rocky Film was used aggressively by America was in the 1980s when a pretend bout between Sylvester Stallone and Dolph Lundgren successfully ended communism in Russia.

It is thought that Sylvester Stallone will be travelling to Pyongyang to fight a huge North Korean boxer who has been trained by government scientists in white coats. Despite Stallone’s age and being crap at boxing he will win, then North Koreans will rise up and demand democracy. This will mean that McDonalds and Burger King can move in and start popping up on every street corner.

In a rare press conference Kim Jong-un has called the moves ‘unnecessary’ and insisted that it is building a long range nuclear missile pointing at America for ‘entirely peaceful purposes’.

A spokesman for the Chinese Government called the proposal for a new Rocky film ‘heavy handed’ and has urged a diplomatic solution.

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