Fury as St George’s day bank holiday on a Sunday

Prime Minister Theresa May has this morning been accused of subterfuge and deceit following mass realisation that the St George’s day bank holiday has somehow been moved to a Sunday when no-one is at work anyway,

“You’re on your own now” says every single economist ever

Every single economist and financial analyst ever has wished Britain the best of luck in it’s exit from the single market, but has ruled out sticking around to watch it happen. A spokesman for credit rating agency Standard and Poors said “I’ve been warning against a clusterfuck of a recession for years and now its […]

UKIP to change name to United Kingdom No MP Party (UKNOMP)

UKIP is to change its name to the United Kingdom No MP party or UKNOMP according to leader Paul Nuttall.

People of Stoke to decide which twat to vote for

The people of Stoke are shortly to decide whether to vote in a monumental twat or just a bit of a twat as their MP in the forthcoming by-election.

Paul Nuttall accused of lying over his Stoke address of 48b Bollocks Avenue

UKIP leader Paul Nuttall has defended his decision to put 48b Bollocks avenue, Stoke-on-Trent on his election nomination form even thought he apparently doesn’t know where it is.

“Thanks Beardy! You’ve got me until 2025!” says May

Theresa May has the best part of a decade to do whatever the fuck she likes unchallenged and unhindered thanks to the British public’s steadfast refusal to trust a man with a beard.

“Britain will be mainly ginger if we get rid of immigrants” warns secret UKIP report

A secret UKIP report has questioned the party’s policy on lowering immigration warning that it could mean an unsustainable rise in ginger haired people.

Immigrants disguising themselves as Elf on the Shelf

Many families hosting an Elf on the Shelf this Christmas may unwittingly be harbouring an illegal immigrant who left unattended would most likely take your job and convert your children to Islam according to UKIP leader Paul Nuttall.

Did Nigel Farage put his finger up Paul Nuttall’s arse during acceptance speech?

New UKIP leader Paul Nuttall has played down reports that Nigel Farage may have inserted his finger into his rectum during his acceptance speech.

Jerry Springer to host UKIP leadership debate

Jerry Springer has confirmed that he will be hosting a live television debate between UKIP leadership candidates Suzanne Evans and Paul Nuttall.