Theresa May looks set to win the forthcoming General election due to the overwhelming popularity of more people needing food banks and her plans to completely dismantle the NHS.
Her policies of selling the NHS to American healthcare firms and paying nurses so poorly that they have to use foodbanks has really struck a chord with the public as as an overwhelming percentage give the thumbs up to support policies which will fuck them over.
“I couldn’t agree with Theresa more. We should have a strong economy before having free healthcare or giving nurses a wage they can actually live on. Theresa hasn’t actually said anything about sorting out any of these things after miraculously producing a stronger economy but she must surely be planning to. Otherwise she’s be a bit of a shit.” One Conservative voter told us.
“And with a hard Brexit there won’t be any of that stupid legislation on workers’ rights that are holding us back as a country.” Another added
“We’ll be fitter and leaner and anyone else will be dead” a smiling Ms May told a public meeting attended only by carefully vetted conservative party members and Laura kuenssberg.
“We need a strong and stable leadership that is consistent in not giving a shit about anyone except corporations and millionaires.
“Of course some people have legitimate concerns about nurses and other public sector workers having to rely on food banks. But I want to grow the economy. And once the economy has been grown I’m still not going to do anything about it.Who do you think I am, Mother fucking Theresa?” She added whilst simultaneously throwing her head back and laughing like a horse.
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