George Bush Senior “My son didn’t blow up enough of the middle east”

George Bush Senior, the 41st President of the United States, has lambasted his son in his new biography which complains that George W Bush Junior only spent a mere half to three quarters of his presidency bombing the absolute fuck out of the middle east. “If he’d just gotten himself out of bed and started […]

Iran nuclear deal all thanks to Doctor Who

Knock Knock. Who’s there? Well actually he wasn’t. But in many respects he was, as it took Doctor Who played by Hurt, Tennant and Smith to finally convince the world that Iran should really have nuclear power. An insider from the talks in Geneva explained “It was quite clear that no-one really had their heart […]

Iran to offer space holidays for monkeys

Iran has been accused of creating a smokescreen with it’s highly publicised ‘free of charge galactic monkey holidays’ the first of which happened yesterday. Western Governments have argued that this display of overt monkey kindness may have a sinister ulterior motive and indeed theories have ranged from plans to start a pro-Iranian ‘planet of the […]

Britain braces itself for outbreak of the Flooby-Doobies

Hospitals around the UK have been closing wards to visitors in the hope of preventing the spread of an incredibly unpleasant virus known as the Flooby-Doobies.  Jeremy Hunt the Health Secretary has said that the 972% daily rise in cases of the affliction, which causes highly irrational shopping habits, was unexplained. He has also warned […]