Parents stampede to enrol their children in the best gangs

Almost half of England’s school districts have more potential gang members  than gang places  according to the latest figures released by the Local Government Association this morning. David Simmonds of the LGA told us  “Mums and dads want to know that there’s a good quality gang in their neighbourhood where their children can tool themselves up […]

Local authorities demand more taxes to wank into a bucket

Councils throughout Britain are demanding more taxes to wank into a bucket as little is left in the coffers for basic services after the majority of local authority income has been wanked into a bucket. The move will hit households on low incomes, particularly since Iain Duncan Smith has decided that poor people don’t actually […]