Murray “may be allowed to be English”


Prime Minister Theresa May has given her clearest indication yet that she may allow Andy Murray his life long dream of being English.

“As you’ll be aware,we’re pulling up the drawbridge regarding offering citizenship to foreigners but now he’s the world number one we should probably let him represent us, obviously with certain caveats. He can’t conduct himself in polite society like that nice Tim Henman but he does seem to have earnt being English, at least in his own little way.” She told Andrew Marr in an interview this morning.

“He won’t be allowed to sit in first class carriages and he might have to give up his seat in restaurants but we’re seriously considering letting him compete for England in the Olympics. As long as he keeps on winning.” Home secretary Amber Rudd added.

Andy Murray, having just beaten Novak Djokovic to win the ATP world tour finals title, was tight lipped today regarding any offer of Anglicization preferring to talk only about the tennis to reporters

However one insider close to Murray told us that he was probably more excited about this than winning Wimbledon but may be afraid to jinx it just in case officials at Westminster change their minds.

“He knows he’ll never be able to shake hands with the queen but apart from that he’ll be nearly as accepted as anyone else in London. It’s life changing.”

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