Elephants have been listening in on Donald Trump with their huge flappy ears and most likely handing the information to Barack Obama, the media or British Intelligence, according to tweets published by Mr Trump earlier this morning.
“Just found out Obama spoke to elephants while he was in Kenya. It’s no secret that they can hear sounds from hundreds of miles away. So unfair!”
Outside twitter Mr Trump has yet to provide solid evidence of any elephant eavesdropping, telling a German reporter following his meeting with Angela Merkel:
“We haven’t actually made an opinion on the subject. This is just what we were told.”
Indeed, Mr Trump’s press secretary Sean Spicer confirmed that the recent travel ban, rather than being focused on Muslims as popularly thought, was actually based on elephant populations, albeit the ones with smaller ears and not quite such good hearing.
“An expert on Fox news told us that an elephant at any zoo in New York would be able to hear the entire goings on in Trump tower. And then with a trumpety -trump translate it into elephant language saying something like “pawoo!” which any operative with knowledge of elephant could conceivably translate back into English.” Mr Spicer explained.
“We’re not disputing it. But we won’t be mentioning it again.” He confirmed.