Employers will be legally able to deny jobs to foreigners, women, lefties and gay people in favour of goose stepping shaven headed nationalists adorned in full nazi regalia, should UKIP hold the balance of power following May’s General Election according to leader Nigel Farage.
Speaking in an interview on popular radio station Common Sense FM, Mr Farage said “I’m not racist, I just make bigoted stereotypical assumptions based on an individual’s perceived ethnic origin, and use these as a reason to discriminate, thus bolstering my popularity with racists and creating a few new racists along the way. And if you honestly think that that’s racism then you’re just going to have to call me a racist. Which is the last thing I am.
“Employers should have the right to employ people who treasure traditional British values. Such as bestiality and incest.”
The plans have already proved popular in racist circles, with one far right activist telling us that he looked forward to being able to apply for ‘all our jobs’ without foreigners having carte blanche to get in their early and take them.
“I’ve always been overlooked by employers in favour of immigrants. Now they might have to choose me over the foreigners and I can pursue my dream vocation as an equal opportunities facilitator” He explained.