McDonalds are to pay HMRC £6.71 an hour in corporation tax following their move to London from Luxembourg for tax purposes.
The corporation, who have denied that they are fleeing Luxembourg following EU investigations into Corporate tax affairs, have said they will even consider paying more corporation tax in the future if they see fit.
“Obviously we won’t pay anything for the first few years. Britain is lucky to have us
so should see it like an internship. But sooner or later we’ll be paying something resembling the minimum wage, minus a few quid for the uniform. And we’ve told Theresa May that we might one day manage £7 per hour once she gets her yellow badge with 5 stars on it.” A spokesman for the restaurant chain which serves food like products told us.
A grinning Nigel Farage told us that he was so pleased that he might actually dress up as a clown.
“It’s just proved that Brexit is working. All the big companies are coming over here. We just have to promise not to ask them to contribute anything to our society or infrastructure. Or they might go somewhere else and not contribute there. And then we’d be fucked.” He explained.