Greg Wallace run over by a cliché

Greg Wallace is reported to be critical but stable, having been run over by a cliché during today’s filming of Masterchef A source from the never-ending, swanky-nosh competition told us “It’s a dangerous job. He spouts this shit day in, day out knowing that at any point one of his nuggets of generic mediocrity could […]

Masterchef won by bloke who cooks with his arse

BBC executives have been left fuming following leaked information that this years Masterchef, all filmed in advance, was actually won by a man who used only his anus in preparing all dishes. Set to be shown on TV at some point next week, Surrey man Bert Onions apparently wows the judges and wins his heat […]