The entire population of Africa are set to get together and build a giant Bono by way of thanks for the singer speaking on their behalf, according to singer Bono who was speaking at the G8 summit today on behalf of the people of Africa.
The speech in which the singer also announced the launch of his new tropical fruit drink range ‘Um Bono’ criticised the G8 for not acting sooner on the matter. “It’s outrageous. Oive been petitioning the G8 conference year after year to build a giant me. But instead they just want me and moi millionaire friends to pay more feckin’ tax instead. So now the poor people of Africa have had to step up to the mark. It’s going to use up all their aid money, so unless people get off their arses and send more money they’ll only be able to build a giant half a me.”
The giant Bono, which when finished next year will be roughly a mile in height, is thought to be the first of many with the aim of having one in every African country. “African people don’t want handouts. They want the means to be able to make huge statues of me. And they’ve asked me to tell you this because they’re all shy.”
Fellow band member The edge (real name Lee Eggs) spoke of his delight at the new project. “I often wonder about the plight of poor people in Africa so it’s good to be in a band with a man who speaks for them. So they don’t have to. No wonder they’ve chosen to spend their aid money on giant Bonos.”