Glastonbury festival is thought to be under threat today following news that McCarthy and Stone have received planning permission to build a retirement complex just yards from where the main stage would normally be situated.
Land owner Michael Eavis said “I was initially against the idea but then it occurred to me that I’ve had years of rocking out at the festival and now I’m getting on a bit. And I’m starting to agree with McCarthy and Stone that it would also be a perfect setting for a retirement home. I might even move in myself one day.”
Work on the complex thought to be starting within the next few days and elderly residents are thought to be moving in just days before the commencement of the festival on the 22nd June. However a spokesman for McCarthy and Stone has assured critics that the move will in no way affect the annual festival and festival goers would still be able to let their hair down as long as they bore in mind that not everyone likes their irresponsible noise.
“They can still have the festival. But they’ll have to keep it down a bit. And it all needs to be wrapped up by 9pm. Otherwise we might have to get the council in on it.”He explained.
“And if there is anywhere that you enjoy going to because it’s fun and has music, our advice to you is to enjoy it while it lasts. Because there is no force on earth that will stop us building retirement flats right next to it” He added.