Police and security services will be able to see the names of all visitors to the conservative party website for 12 months before their guilty little secret can finally be rubbed from the records, according to legislation passed today by Home Secretary Theresa May.
One worried internet user told us “It’s an appalling invasion of privacy. I’m a card carrying labour member all year and one night I get a bit pissed and decide to look at a picture of Michael Gove, that’s on my record for another 12 months knowing that the police and MI5 are looking at my internet history and laughing.”
A spokesman for the Met assured worried internet users that the police would only be able to see the sites visited and not the specific content.
“We’ll only be able to see your internet history, if we decide to look at it. And even if you have ended up on the conservative party website ‘out of curiosity’, we won’t be able to tell if you’ve been watching a bit of Iain Duncan Smith or perusing a bit of Jeremy Hunt.
“But let’s face it if you’ve been on the site at all, even after you’ve had a few, then you’ve obviously got a thing about austerity measures, posh blokes taking charge of things and more than likely some interest in hanging from the rafters wearing ladies underwear with an apple up your bum.”
Another internet user we spoke to said he was just having a final view of the site before the law came in to play.
“I’m just looking at it from an ironic perspective” He told us.