Donald Trump is ordering a pizza this evening and Domino’s are going to pay for it, according to a tweet from the President.
“I’ve told them. They’re footing the bill. It hasn’t arrived yet but it’ll be here any minute. Otherwise we have nothing to talk about.” He tweeted earlier today.
A spokesman for Domino’s said “We’re not sending him a pizza. Largely because he hasn’t actually placed an order. He’s just been talking about it on twitter.”
The revelations have sparked widespread political unrest with scientists bringing the doomsday clock another minute nearer midnight. There is also mass concern amongst political analysts worried over how not getting any dinner might affect Mr Trump’s already fragile grasp on reality.
“We all get a little irrational if we skip a meal. In Trump’s case this might make him a bit more normal. But that’s the thing, we just don’t know.”
Mr Trump is thought unlikely to be dining in any Tex Mex establishments either this evening, having today vowed to impose a 20% tax on the Mex bits but not the Tex. “Some media outlets are spreading fake news that by taxing the Mex we inadvertently tax the Tex. Read my lips no Tex Tax. Tax Mex.” Mr Trump explained.