Prince Charles tells skeptics “Be more scientific except homeopathy”

Heir Apparent to the British throne Prince Charles has issued climate change deniers with one of his firmest rebuke yet “Stop running around like headless chickens and start taking note of the overwhelming scientific data. Unless it’s homeopathy.”

Speaking at the Young Sustainability Entrepreneur awards, the apprentice King explained  “All of a sudden, and with a barrage of sheer intimidation, we are told by powerful groups of deniers that the scientists are wrong and we must abandon all our faith in so much overwhelming scientific evidence. You must always trust solid scientific evidence. Apart from in healthcare where you should ignore all scientific data to instead believe that in order to cure a particular disease you should contrive an unproven nonsense remedy, mix it with a huge amount of water, shake it, hit it with a leather thwacky thing and then drip a small amount of it into a sugar pill. In this case science is wrong.”

Homeopathy began in Europe in the 1700s and died out when people decided it was total bollocks, so sold the concept to India. A century or so  later it was sold back to Europe as a mystical eastern remedy. As Prince Charles himself has pointed out “Homeopathy is so pure, natural and wonderful that it doesn’t require scientific evidence. It is above that sort of thing.”

So concerned is his Royal Highness about climate change that he is planning to protest by continuously flying round the world in his private jet on public engagements until something is done about it. “He’s just waiting for the Queen to fully hand over the reigns so he gets her fuel card.”

The Prince has however conceded that a waterlogged Britain is ideal for homeopathy. “It’s all about mixing things with water. We just need to make the magic work by slapping the entire county of  Somerset with a huge leather thwacky thing. No-one really knows how it works. It just does.”