Brexiters’ fury as one of asylum seeking children actually a bear

Brexiters and Ukipers have voiced their indignation that one of the handful of child asylum seekers let into Britain might actually be a bear.

One furious Daily Mail reader told us “I’m against all immigrants and blame them for all my personal shortfalls. Yet somehow I look bad when I’m advocating a lack of compassion for children travelling alone, on danger fraught journeys, who have family in Britain who could look after them. You couldn’t make it up. But if it turned out that one of them was a bear, that would make me seem right, and it would shut up the lefties.

“One of them is definitely a bear. Look. Here’s a picture of a bear.”

Indeed, Nigel Farage told us that the sooner Britain leaves the EU, the less chance there is of a child refugee actually being a bear, whether black, brown, koala or otherwise.

“We need to earmark our resources for British bears. Rather than letting foreign bears just come waltzing over the border diluting our Britishness with their foreign bear ways. People don’t want proof that this is happening. They want me jabbering on over a pint and a cigarette. I’m just saying what they’re all thinking. I’m like a breath of fresh air.” He explained.

A spokesman for the Home office said that there was no single case on record of any non EU immigrants actually being a bear.

“And that’s how slack their vetting system is. It’s a joke.” Mr Farage told us.