The Pope has been called on today to ditch his antiquated religious garb from the middle ages and wear swimming trunks round the clock on the off chance that he fancies a dip in the sea.
Vatican to invade the Falkland Islands
March 19, 2013 by
Shiny new Pope Frank has announced at his Inauguration Mass today that his first task as Catholic Church Boss will be to lead an all out invasion of the Falkland Islands. Speaking in Latin, he told the 200.000 strong crowd “I’ve been approached by Argentinian president Cristina Fernandez and asked if I can do something […]
Next pope “may have to be a dalek”
February 26, 2013 by
The next pope may well have to be a dalek, according to an outspoken Vatican source, in what is seen as one of the most dramatic breaks from ecumenical convention since the 12th Century when the papacy was briefly awarded to an elk. Speaking at a press conference this morning, Vatican Head of Communications Cardinal […]
Pope is ‘just lazy’
February 11, 2013 by
Pope Benedict XVI has resigned, saying that at his age he cannot carry out all his tasks adequately and is losing strength in body and mind. However, information from those closest to him suggests that he just can’t be arsed. A Vatican insider told us “This comes as no surprise to us. On numerous occasions […]
It’s Snoop Popey Pope as rapper hot favourite for Vatican leadership
February 11, 2013 by
The Catholic Church has been thrown into turmoil today by the Pope’s decision to resign from the catholic Church to ‘seek new challenges within the private sector’. The announcement came as a surprise to insiders who had gathered to join the Pope for his weekly game of ‘ecumenical cricket’, where participants gain one run for […]
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