Coca Cola to sue Church over ownership of Christmas

A spokesman for Coca Cola has confirmed that the company’s lawyers have written to church leaders asking them to cease and desist from hijacking Christmas day for their own religious ends. “It’s about time these bible thumpers stopped hijacking our special day.It’s all very nice this away in a manger business but it’s hardly in […]

Brainwashed couple win right to be married by a cult

A brainwashed couple have won the right to be married by a cult at their main head quarters following a ruling from the supreme court today. Grinning in a scary fashion with huge huge eyes the Bride to be Louisa Hodkin told a packed press conference “It’s been a long drawn out case, but at last […]

Aspiring women Bishops turn to Satan

Aspiring women Bishops are leaving the Church of England in their droves and moving to worship the Dark Lord Satan according to the latest figures released by the Office of National statistics this morning. It appears that despite the agreement of the Synod to reconsider the matter of women Bishops next year, many lady vicars […]

Candy Crush Saga revealed as front for Church of Scientology

It starts out as fun, then you have to pay money, then you find out we are descendants of aliens. Only when you finally decide it’s all bollocks and decide to knock the whole thing on the head that you start to get vans with blacked out windows permanently parked outside your house. To make […]

It’s Snoop Popey Pope as rapper hot favourite for Vatican leadership

The Catholic Church has been thrown into turmoil today by the Pope’s decision to resign from the catholic Church to ‘seek new challenges within the private sector’. The announcement came as a surprise to insiders who had gathered to join the Pope for his weekly game of ‘ecumenical cricket’, where participants gain one run for […]