Britain celebrates as devolution means lots and lots more politicians


People across the British Isles have been celebrating throughout the night at news that and English Parliament, a London Parliament, a Cornwall parliament, an East Anglian Parliament and a Manchester Parliament on top of bigger Scottish, Welsh and Northern Irish Assemblies mean lots and lots more politicians wittering on incessantly, and troughing it up, all with additional  business interests that just happen to get public contracts and all their salaries and expenses paid for out of the public purse.

One reveller told us “Hooray. We need more of them. All refusing to answer straight questions and all coming out of it a few million quid up at the end of their term. I for one am delighted to paying more tax for administration costs rather than it going towards helping out poor people or something.”

Another party goer said “We’re sick of corrupt Westminster politicians. And corrupt local councillors. So what everybody needs are a whole new intake of regional corrupt politicians as well.”

A further reveller euphorically shrieked “It’s going to be great. We’ll spend ages lobbying and protesting to an MP and find out we’re complaining to the wrong fucking parliament. What a hoot!

“Because all these new politicians paid for by us are going to represent the people and selflessly make our lives better. Aren’t they?”

Former SNP leader Alex Salmond told us that a Yes vote would have meant only one politician necessary at least north of the Tyne.  “That would have been me, but you’ve blown it. I’m off to wind up Barvarians about leaving Germany” he explained.

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