Clouds on Mars could mean alien invasion

Swirling clouds spotted on Mars could mean some sort of invasion of earth by some sort of alien race, scientists admitted today.

A spokesman from Jodrell Bank Observatory told us “We thought Mars did not have an atmosphere, but now it has clouds it clearly does. Or maybe it doesn’t. And that might be even more scary because it could mean that the clouds might be whipped up from Martian dust by a sudden flurry of activity, which happen as might be alien beings getting ready to mount some sort of attack.”

The public have been urged not to panic unless they really feel the need to and television Professor Brian Cox has gone on record to assure people that everything will probably be alright.

“They might be going off to invade another planet. The chances of it being us are minute, apart from us being the next one along. Or they might be coming here to make friends. Or it might turn out that they’ve come to invade us but they’re actually a little bit weedy and we’re harder than them. We might turn out to be the hardest race in the universe, apart from animals on earth that are harder than us like hippos and leopards. And anacondas.

“Or they might be really small, and already here, battling against flies or worms.

“Either way I’ll be keeping an eye on things from my fortified underground bunker. Along with most politicians and rich people.”