Scotland will continue to have referendums indefinitely until one goes in favour of independence, at which point it will stop having them and draw a line under the whole affair, according to Scotland’s First Minister Nicola Sturgeon.
During angry exchanges between Scottish party leaders Ms Sturgeon said “Simply accepting the first, second or third referendum results is ignoring the sovereign will of the people, unless they vote for independence, in which case we must accept it and respect the sovereign will of the people.”
Ms Sturgeon lamented the fact that there had not been a referendum or two already in the last 12 months.
“We should be able to announce it, vote on it and act on it in one day, assuming it is for independence. Otherwise we don’t want to be too hasty, we’ll have another one in a few days just to make sure. The moment we found out the Prime Minister pleasured a pig we should have snuck a quick referendum in and shut up shop.”
The speech has had the full support of former Scottish First Minister and SNP leader Alex Salmon. “How do you like your coffee? Black? How do you like your coffee? Black? How do you like your coffee? Black? How do you like your coffee? White? Here’s your coffee.” He explained.