The word shit has been downgraded from swearing to merely slang according to new Government measures announced this morning.
Speaking to a packed press conference Prime Minister David Cameron said “I can confirm that shit is now a perfectly normal word. Shitty shit. Shit shit shitterty shit. Shit.”
The move is seen as yet another blow for the Lib Dems following Deputy Prime Minister Nick Clegg’s recent quote “Read my lips. No downgrading of rude words, particularly the word shit, whilst the Lib Dems are in coalition”
It’s the first time such measures have been introduced since former Labour Prime Minister Harold Wilson passed a law making it acceptable to say bother in 1974.
Bespectacled political correspondent Nick Robinson told us that many other swear words are likely to be downgraded over the next few years. “By 2019 it will be absolutely fine to say cunt.” He explained.
However, the move is understood to be singularly unpopular with people who rely on swearing for a steady income. Rapper Ice Cube told us “I’m not happy about this at all. In the rap trade we rely on the word shit to gain the listeners attention before proceeding to further offensive diatribes. Now shit isn’t a swear word we might as well be saying wardrobe or daffodil. I’m going to have to remake all NWA records using the word poo instead. Thank you very much David Bastard Cameron.”
News Toad 
And by 2016, Fuck would become a normal word too