The National Association of Alternative Rockers have confirmed this evening that all members will be continuing to express their individuality from the norm by dressing up identically, sporting the same haircuts, going to the same places and listening to exactly the same playlist in a display of uniformity that would make Kim Jong Un jealous.
“It was a unanimous decision” a spokesman confirmed
One gentleman with a bandana, moustache, lots of bracelets and a tattoo told us “I’m free thinking and different and I’m not shallow like you. That’s why I’m going to my alternative rock local to listen to the same music as last week and rock out with my friends who are all wearing exactly the same. And some make up. And that’s what makes us different. All of us. In exactly the same way.”
“When I look at people going to work in the mornings all wearing exactly the same clothes I laugh uncontrollably inside, because though I have to wear a suit for work as well, I know that in the evening I’ll be wearing the same kit as some different people and that’s what makes me stand out. Or not.”
Another alternative rocker told us “It’s all about living life on the edge. Within a carefully organised template.”