Sarah Palin warns immigrants to speak the language of earlier immigrants

All immigrants in America must speak American, but not native American, according to former Governor of Alaska, and anti-recent immigration politician, Sarah Palin.

Speaking to a large gathering of people waving flags and chanting ‘USA!’, Mrs Palin said “If you want to be in America, let’s speak American. None of that indigenous American from before there was mass immigration from Europe though. Obviously it was alright for our European ancestors to come over here speaking their own languages because it was basically us. Now it’s not alright because its them. And if anyone thinks they’re going to turn up here speaking Cherokee or Arapaho then they can just as well go to back to their own country even if that happens to be this one.”

The move has caused some confusion amongst immigrants who have been learning German en masse following revelations that it was just as popular as English in the 1700s.

However, Mrs Palin told us “Let me stress all immigrants in America should be speaking the most popularly held language to be brought over by immigrants and not other languages that were previously popular that were brought over by immigrants and not languages that are still popular now like Spanish and particularly not languages spoken by indigenous non-immigrants. I hope that makes things clear.”

Republican leadership candidate and presidential hopeful Donald Trump said “I didn’t understand what she said but she’s absolutely right and she’s only saying what we’re all thinking.”