UKIP members and leave voters have been popping corks this evening following news that the value of the pound reached the same as it was in 1972, just before Britain joined the EU.
An emotional UKIP leader Nigel Farage told us:
“Strikes, power cuts, rationing fuel, it’s everything we’ve been working for. We’ll be poor, but we’ll be happy because we can blame our poverty on an immigrant that went to see a Doctor. And now we don’t have to abide by EU laws, whatever they are. And we won’t have to pay EU taxes, whatever they are. And even better, we can’t even go abroad because the pound isn’t worth anything. We can stay here and be British. Very British indeed.”
Indeed one Brexity reveller explained “We would be drinking champagne but it’s french. Of course, these days England actually makes good bubbly as well, but luckily we’ve found some proper independent English stuff from the 1970s that is properly shit. It’s so shit I can’t even drink it. I’m so happy.”
Prime Minister Theresa May has heralded a new era where no-one can afford to go out of an evening but won’t be able to stay in either as the TV will be in black and white and stop at ten o’clock to make way for God save the queen and the test card, but she also urged caution.
“It’s not a time to start making sensible decisions. Any nonsense about staying in the single market and the pound could ping right back up again.” She warned.