The ‘Brexit’ campaign has gained momentum this morning following the news that it has a staunch supporter and campaigner in Her Majesty the Queen.
In a rare statement to the press, her Majesty said “People are coming over here just for the benefits. They think we’re a soft touch and they’re probably right. For example I get £38 million a year. If everyone on benefits gets that there’s no incentive for them to find work.”
And her Majesty the Queen warned that a vote to stay in could serve to weaken Britain’s sovereignty, and subject the UK to far more EU directives.
“You can’t trust foreigners to make your decisions for you. I should know. I’m German. And Philip’s Greek.”
“I’ve had the pleasure of meeting people all over the world. And the thought of them all coming over here and having to see them again on my own doorstep fills me with horror. Put alligators in the channel. Lift up the draw bridge. It’s about time we shut up shop.”
Nigel Farage who plans to immolate himself in the event of a withdrawal from the EU, his work on this sphere being complete, has offered the Queen his full support.
“A fucking knighthood for me then” He told us.