Modern medicine as we know it has been infected by a severe case of Jeremy Fucking Hunt which is proving resistant to all known treatments Doctors have warned today.
A spokesman for the BMA said “One day we might find a cure but right now it’s like trying to get rid of syphilis in the 18th century. Except Syphilis symptoms go away and come back. Unlike a nasty case of Hunt which appears to never ever fuck off.”
The statement comes as the World Health Organisation also issued warnings of Britain being infested with a smarmy non-consultative version of the ebola virus. A member of Medecins sans Frontieres also told us that a team would soon be sent to the UK for all the fucking good it would do.
“Why the new Prime Minister Theresa May has not offered Doctors her support in combating this pestilence is beyond us. We can only assume that either she too wants to sell the NHS to one of her rich friends or she actually did want to remove Hunt but didn’t have the right gloves. In fairness to her I wouldn’t try and move him, he is thought to be quite contagious” one Doctor explained.
A research laboratory dedicated to finding a cure for ‘the Jeremies’, as they are commonly called, has had to cease its work after its funding was abruptly stopped. By Jeremy Hunt.