Corbyn “Shit, I meant vote against article 50”

Labour Leader Jeremy Corbyn has this evening asked if parliament can possibly have another vote, having realised that he just whipped his MPs to duck out of the world’s biggest free marketplace and leave Theresa May free to completely shaft workers rights.

“Ah, that’s it. I remember. I meant to say, “Comrades, oppose article 50 with every fibre of your being and on preventing it call an early General election meaning a return to a fairer more egalitarian society.” Yes, that’s the one. Did I just give Theresa May absolute Carte blanche to do what the fuck she likes? Whoops.” He explained.

“I’d forget my own head if it wasn’t screwed  on.” He added

“On the plus side there’ll be a clusterfuck of a recession and a lot more people using food banks that I can really hold the government to account over. Luckily I have a £1.6 million pension pot paid for by the tax payer. I’m like a breath of fresh air.” He surmised.

Prime Minister Theresa May told us she felt thoroughly held to account by the opposition and would definitely be watching her step from now on.