Rolf Harris confirmed as Strictly contestant

Rolf Harris has confirmed that he will be entering Strictly Come Dancing as a contestant for the forthcoming 2017 competition.

One source from the popular show said “We’re all such big fans. It seems odd that he hasn’t been hosting Animal Hospital or dancing around with a wobble-board for a while, so we hope this will kick start his career.”

Producer Richard Hopkins who is understood to have purchased much of Mr Harris’s art work just before it inexplicably lost much of its value, has denied commissioning the Australian artist simply to mitigate his own personal losses.

“The public have missed Rolf. He might have become unpopular, even to the point of people no longer whistling the tune of 2 little boys in public anymore, but that doesn’t mean we can’t get him right back on prime time TV again. They said the same about Dave Lee Travis and he nearly won it last year.” He explained.

Indeed, former ‘It’s a Knockout’ presenter Stuart Hall who will be one of the judges in this year’s series has lauded the appointment as a victory for common sense.

“The ratings are going to go through the roof. You’ll have him stopping dancing to play the wobble-board or draw a picture and I’ll be insisting all the dancers dress up in giant costumes so I can laugh loudly when they fall over. People will be far to busy being entertained to worry about who might possibly have done what to who and who should or shouldn’t be on the telly.” He told us.

Other contestants for 2017 are thought to include the Queen, former EDL leader Tommy Robinson and some other cunts.