Paul Golding “Donald Trump is my father”

Britain First leader Paul Golding has revealed that US president Donald Trump is his father in a candid interview with the Guardian.

In an extract for the full interview to be published tomorrow, Mr Golding says “I’ve done everything I can to impress him. I’ve abandoned all my hippy mates from Uni, I’ve blamed all the problems of today’s society on Muslims, I’ve incited hatred, I’ve even manipulated social media with a little bit of help from Russia, but he barely seems to notice me. And the fact that he has started retweeting Jayda’s tweets on twitter rather than mine just makes me want to give up and work for Jeremy Corbyn instead.”

Indeed, behind the overwhelming urge to impress his estranged father, lies a man secretly comfortable with ethnic diversity and an eclectic mixture of religions and secular societies rubbing along together in harmony.

“Sometimes I think I’ll just accept that Donald is never going to invite me over for Christmas and just give up on the whole far right thing and go travelling for a year or two. Maybe work for an NGO.

“I actually tried to go backpacking with Jayda in Europe a couple of months ago and the whole thing was a disaster.”

Whilst Mr Trump has been unusually tight lipped regarding the whole affair he has talked about it a lot on twitter.

“Apart from the fact that he looks a lot more like me than my actual son and we share the same political views and we both look like a leg of cured pork, there is no evidence that we are even slightly related. You can’t just read my name on a birth certificate and assume it’s me.” He tweeted yesterday.