Britain First to boycott Wimbledon following decision to sell Halal strawberries

Britain First strawberries

Britain First leader Paul Golding has confirmed that he will boycott Wimbledon this year following the competition’s decision to sell only Halal strawberries.

Already protesting outside Wimbledon in advance of the tournament an angry Mr Golding said:

“It’s supposed to be a British event for British people. Wimbledon should have their tennis licenses taken off them. They’re basically traitors. I for one will not attend a single match. Neither will I watch any of them on tv either live or repeated. In fact I refuse to be in the same room as a tennis ball until Wimbledon agree to sell overpriced strawberries of a make up that somehow precludes Muslims from enjoying them.

“And they’ll arrest me for it. They will. There’ll be here any minute.

“It’s eroding all our sporting culture, not just tennis. When I saw England play Pakistan at cricket almost half the crowd didn’t look like they were British Caucasian. I was in Pakistan but the chances are a home match would have been just the same.”

Deputy Britain First leader said “Where there are Halal strawberries there is extremism. And we understand that these strawberries have been openly on sale to children as well. I have even been told by someone who works in a strawberry factory that all strawberries are now Halal. So we’re petitioning local mosques to demand a return to Christian strawberries. So far they’ve been suspiciously quiet on the subject.”

It is not known whether the tournament will suffer financially in the absence of the far right either not buying tickets or not watching it on tv. A spokesman for Wimbledon has refused to comment.

Comments

  1. vegansareattentionseekers says:

    Mcains oven chips are halal.Which I thought was odd.

  2. I demand atheist strawberries now.. if not sooner.

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