Paul Golding announced as new Doctor Who

paul golding doctor who

Britain First leader Paul Golding has confirmed that he will be making his acting debut later this year having been offered the role of Doctor Who.

“Where there is Islam there are daleks.” Mr Golding announced. “Obviously I can’t reveal much of the plot of the new series. These are just my own personal beliefs.”

Tight lipped as Mr Golding appears to be regarding the new series, it has emerged that the new Doctor starts by having mechanical issues with his Tardis which he blames on Islam and immediately goes to shout at people outside the nearest mosque.

His new assistant Jayda Fransen said “The Doctor meets me while we’re both shouting at random people outside a mosque. He offers to take me away to experience new cultures and diverse forms of life throughout the realms of time and space. I reply no thank you very much, there’s enough of them over here and we go off to shout at random people outside another mosque instead.”

The news was broken this morning by the Mail Online which have been running a series of headlines concerned that the children’s science fiction series may not have a heterosexual white man as it’s leading character.

One Daily Mail reader said “We were hoping for Nigel Farage but at least it wasn’t a woman, or a black person.”

The new Doctor will be announced after the Wimbledon final today. But it’s definitely Paul Golding.

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: