North Korea prepared to use Chinese Burns

North Korea has been observed training troops to perform the fearsome military tactic of a Chinese Burn according to South Korea’s Foreign Minister.  Kim Kwan-jin has however urged caution and played down concerns that this could potentially leave the United States with a slightly sore wrist. In a statement via the Korean Central News Agency, […]

Kim Jong Un “We’ll stop if Danny Dyer stops making films”

Supreme leader of North Korea Kim Jong Un has signaled that he may be prepared to cease all threats of launching a nuclear attack on South Korea or the USA on the proviso that cockney geyser thespian Danny Dyer ceases making his shit films immediately. Close friend and confidant George Galloway told us “It’s no […]

World leaders jealous of Kim Jong-Un’s birthday rocket

World leaders have today been united in their resentment of Kim Jong-Un’s birthday treat from his government, a Unha-3 rocket, launched at 09:49 local time (00:49 GMT), which appears to have followed its planned trajectory, whilst dropping all manner of shit in expected areas. In a televised statement issued by the Korean central News Agency, […]