Diesel powered juggernaut promoting diabetes causing drink to celebrate Jesus’ birthday

A large diesel powered lorry is to drive around the country hijacking a religious festival to promote it’s own corporate agenda, with free samples of a drink that erodes your teeth and causes diabetes.

Theresa May “The bible says I must take disabled people’s cars away”

Theresa May has only passed legislation to take mobility cars away from disabled people because it says so in the bible according to an interview with the God fearing Prime minister.

God refuses to attend Trump’s inauguration

Donald Trump has suffered the biggest snub to his presidency so far after God has reportedly ruled out attending the President Elect’s inauguration.

Trump “Pope should stick to being a Muslim”

The Pope should stick to being a Muslim and stop criticising megalomaniac gun toting Christians, according to goose stepping presidential hopeful Donald Trump. Responding to the Pope’s argument that building a huge wall between USA and Mexico might be divisive and even unchristian, Mr Trump said he was not prepared to have his religion criticised […]

America hails new drug to cure atheists

American scientists have hailed a breakthrough in medical science with a drug that finally cures atheism. The drug named Omniprezole is said to be so effective that it is to be made available immediately without any further clinical trials. Politician and pro-omniprezole campaigner Sarah Palin told us “It’s a nightmare trying to start wars and […]

Cameron “Stand up for Christianity apart from feeding poor people”

Prime Minister David Cameron has urged the public to follow him in his crusade to stand up for Christianity, apart from the bit about feeding poor people. “We’re all for dressing up in funny costumes, singing dull songs on a Sunday morning and being pious. Coupled with that we can use our new found religious […]

Religions given till the end of the month to prove it

Religious leaders from all faiths have been asked to prove the existence of their various deities by the end of the month or refrain from wittering on and wearing silly hats, according to new Government measures announced this morning. A spokesman for the Coalition confirmed “Obviously we were going to have to legislate it sooner […]