The news 'they' don't want you to hear. Because it isn't true.
David Cameron has reportedly been seen leaving Jim Davidson’s house sparking rumours that he may be wooing the support of the popular comedian. The support of the veteran comedian whose popularity means that he regularly fills provincial town halls and civic centres, holds such power amongst middle England that a thumbs up from him could […]
Nigel Farage has promised that a UKIP Government will reverse the recent decision to make St Paul’s cathedral half mosque, following plans that deem it to be a mosque 50% of the time and an Anglican church the other 50%. Speaking from outside St Pauls an angry Mr Farage said “It doesn’t look like a […]
The General Election took an unexpected turn this morning when aspiring Conservative leader Boris Johnson told all floating voters that a vote for his party would mean free drugs. Speaking this morning on the Andrew Marr show where he was vying with Labour Leader Ed Miliband for the best vote winning policies Mr Johnson said […]
HSBC are considering moving to a different country where it can do whatever the fuck it likes, as opposed to being more regulated, having to pay more tax and exhibit evidence of some sort of social conscience. The move follows plans announced in the budget to increase the bank levy. A spokesman for the bank […]
Lib Dem leader Nick Clegg has welcomed the party’s latest celebrity endorsement in the form of the bloke out of 1990s super band Babylon Zoo who has come out of apparent obscurity to swear his full allegiance. Speaking from the Lib Dem tour bus, the star told a packed crowd “I had a hit once, […]
The SNP have “Big plans for the Home Counties” and are fully prepared to discuss non-Scottish things with non-Scottish people should they hold the balance of power following the General Election on May 7th. SNP leader Nicola Sturgeon told a press conference that should she find herself as Deputy Prime Minister she would immerse herself […]
A Labour Government will put legislation into place to enable all workers to occasionally kick their boss up the arse without any risk of being fired or incurring criminal charges according to leader Ed Miliband. Speaking on the Marr show the shadow Prime Minister said “We still need to make difficult decisions in terms of […]
UKIP leader Nigel Farage has vowed to the British public that should he not win the Thanet parliamentary seat he will eat a paella. Launching the party’s manifesto, Mr Farage said “It’ll be a huge paella and not one of those microwave ones from Asda neither. This will be a proper Spanish one with snails […]
A conservative only Government will enable the Queen to buy some or all of her council houses thus enabling her to finally get her foot on the property ladder rather than slumming it in state owned accommodation. Launching his election manifesto Mr Cameron said that all of Britain deserved the good life. It was just […]
UKIP scientists have found a way back to the 1970s and may be leaving en masse in a big racist space ship come time machine, taking all their supporters with them according to leader Nigel Farage. Speaking to John Humphrys on Radio 4’s Today Programme Mr Farage explained “All we ever wanted is to go […]
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