Comedian and Magician Jerry Sadowitz is set to host the new series of Great British Bake off according to Channel 4 who announced yesterday that they had won the contract for the flagship cake making competition.
Cameron to start new life as a farmer
September 12, 2016 by Leave a Comment
Former Prime Minister David Cameron is to start a new career as a farmer, following his resignation as an MP today.
Parents fury as son sent home from school for Oompa-Loompa attire
September 10, 2016 by Leave a Comment
Angry parents have today slammed the decision of their son’s headmaster to send him home from school simply because he was dressed up as an Oompa-Loompa, as ludicrous and akin to the actions of Adolf Hitler on a bad day.
Public warned not to approach rapidly inflating Liam Fox
September 10, 2016 by Leave a Comment
The British public have been warned not to approach a rapidly expanding Liam Fox who reportedly began inflating at an alarming rate following a talk at a Conservative party dinner yesterday.
Club shut down by people who don’t go clubbing anymore
September 7, 2016 by Leave a Comment
People who don’t go clubbing have called the closure of London super-club Fabric, a victory for common sense, particularly as they don’t go clubbing anymore so it won’t affect them.
Would you pass Nigel Farage’s points based immigration system?
September 5, 2016 by Leave a Comment
Nigel Farage is very cross that Prime Minister Theresa May won’t adopt a points based immigration system. But what would Britain look like if Nigel were to award points to immigrants? Try this simple test to see if you would get in.
“Here you are. Here’s €13 billion” Apple tell EU
August 30, 2016 by Leave a Comment
Technology giant Apple has handed over €13 billion to the European Commission today telling officials they were surprised they hadn’t asked earlier.
Post boxes to stop wearing Burkas
August 29, 2016 by Leave a Comment
Post boxes are going to have to stop wearing Burkas and start dressing like everybody else according to leaked minutes of a recent Government meeting. One Government insider told us “They don’t make any effort to fit in. They’re just all clad in red apart from the small rectangular gap at the top through […]
Reiki healer jailed for misdiagnosing and treating wrong chakra
August 28, 2016 by 4 Comments
A Reiki healer has been jailed today after a court heard that she misdiagnosed and subsequently transmitted Reiki to the wrong chakra which could have seriously affected her patient’s flow of chi.
“Tell them it was a bike accident” Corbyn tells Branson
August 26, 2016 by 4 Comments
Sir Richard Branson is this morning still denying that he was duffed up by Jeremy Corbyn after a row about trains earlier in the week.
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