The news 'they' don't want you to hear. Because it isn't true.
Russell Brand has changed his mind and appealed to the public not to vote. Speaking eloquently through the medium of the English language Mr Brand said “I revert forthwith to my original stance. Forsooth I mistook the emotions I experienced after meeting Ed Miliband for a desire to vote for him and persuade my less […]
The General Election took an unexpected turn this morning when aspiring Conservative leader Boris Johnson told all floating voters that a vote for his party would mean free drugs. Speaking this morning on the Andrew Marr show where he was vying with Labour Leader Ed Miliband for the best vote winning policies Mr Johnson said […]
A Labour Government will put legislation into place to enable all workers to occasionally kick their boss up the arse without any risk of being fired or incurring criminal charges according to leader Ed Miliband. Speaking on the Marr show the shadow Prime Minister said “We still need to make difficult decisions in terms of […]
The Easter week-end has been a time for double celebration for ginger Lib Dem Danny Alexander as the Chief Secretary to the treasury was also celebrating his 21st birthday. Mr Alexander is thought to have toasted his 21st with a select group of friends of a similar age before bringing the festivities to an early […]
David Cameron and Ed Miliband have refused to rule out a coalition with each other should the smaller parties start getting too many seats and therefore want to be involved in Government. A spokesman for both parties said “It should be quite straight forward. We’ll do some things we want to do and some things […]
The Green Party have pledged at least 30% more sunshine and flowers should they be voted in to power in the General election in May. The pledges are part of their recently released manifesto which also promises 28% more skipping. 13% more fluffy bunnies, and 41% more sitting round a fire with an acoustic guitar […]
The Conservative plan to send an empty chair to the forthcoming political debates between seven parties is looking to have worked in their favour today, as already, several weeks before their commencement the chair is leading dramatically in the polls. One member of the public told us that whilst he generally voted labour, he would […]
Young people will be required to earn any social security benefits they may receive by painting themselves orange and assisting in the production of chocolate on a live-in basis, according to strict new measures announced today by Prime Minister David Cameron. “We have to end this entitlement culture. And young people are going to have […]
The Guardian and Daily Telegraph have announced that they are teaming up with on line skin flick vendor Porn Hub to host an online leader’s debate ahead of the General election in May. A spokesman for the three media outlets explained “People are bored of stagnant debate and lame party political broadcasts on BBC and […]
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