UKIP members and leave voters have been popping corks this evening following news that the value of the pound reached the same as it was in 1972, just before Britain joined the EU.
Diane James to “strangle a puppy a day” until Britain leaves EU
September 16, 2016 by Leave a Comment
New UKIP leader and salaried MEP Diane James has promised UKIP members that she will squeeze the life out of a new born puppy every single day until Britain invokes article 50 and then every day after that until the process is complete.
Would you pass Nigel Farage’s points based immigration system?
September 5, 2016 by Leave a Comment
Nigel Farage is very cross that Prime Minister Theresa May won’t adopt a points based immigration system. But what would Britain look like if Nigel were to award points to immigrants? Try this simple test to see if you would get in.
Britain votes to put its dick in a blender
June 24, 2016 by 4 Comments
Britain has voted to put it’s own penis in a food processor and turn it on in order to make Britain great again.
Iran to join EU warn BREXIT campaigners
June 21, 2016 by Leave a Comment
The Islamic republic of Iran will most likely join the EU later this year according to UKIP leader and prominent BREXIT campaigner Nigel Farage.
Justin Bieber to back leave campaign
June 15, 2016 by Leave a Comment
The campaign for Britain to remain in the EU has suffered another setback today following news that Justin Bieber has thrown his weight behind the leave campaign.
Britain will be forced to have French loos warn Brexit
May 18, 2016 by 1 Comment
British citizens will be forced to balance on their haunches with their trousers round their ankles and shit into a hole in the ground rather than use British seated toilets, should the UK vote to remain in the European Union, Brexit campaigners have warned today. A furious Boris Johnson said “We need to take back […]
David Cameron’s cat 8th on Sunday Times rich list
April 24, 2016 by Leave a Comment
Prime Minister David Cameron has refused to discuss the apparent wealth of his cat as publicised today in the Sunday Times rich list arguing that it is a private matter. Speaking this morning on the Marr show Mr Cameron said “Obviously I might have helped him open the accounts. He’s a cat. Does he pay […]
Farage “Europeans enjoying free foreign holidays”
April 15, 2016 by Leave a Comment
Europeans are enjoying free foreign holidays at our expense according to UKIP leader Nigel Farage.
Farage “Immigrants stole my tax returns”
April 11, 2016 by 1 Comment
Immigrants have stolen Nigel Farage’s tax returns leaving him unable to publish them according to a statement issued today by the UKIP leader.
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