Theresa May’s new cabinet are to hold their meetings in the middle of the night, when most of the British public are tucked up safe and sound, according to sources close to the new Prime Minister.
Theresa May “I’m the big change you all wanted”
July 11, 2016 by Leave a Comment
Prime Minister in waiting Theresa May has congratulated the electorate for really sticking it to the man with the recent EU referendum with a warming message to the public. “I’m the fruit of your endeavours. I’m the big change you wanted.
Portsmouth park to become shrine to Margaret Thatcher
July 10, 2016 by Leave a Comment
A park in the centre of Portsmouth is to become a shrine to former Conservative Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher including a 30 foot statue surrounded by right wing topiary.
Angela Eagle leadership bid sponsored by Starbucks
July 10, 2016 by 1 Comment
Angela Eagle’s leadership campaign for the top job in the Labour party is to be sponsored by coffee giant Starbucks, according to a statement released today, heralding a partnership that is thought to be completely impartial, aside from some very important messages. Though the leadership bid has been announced today, it will officially begin tomorrow […]
Leadsom to bring back corporal punishment, ducking stools and blood letting
July 7, 2016 by 1 Comment
Conservative leadership hopeful Andrea Leadsom will bring back corporal punishment, blood letting and ducking tools should she obtain the job of Prime Minister.
Blair “Why did no-one tell me the Iraq war was a bad idea?”
July 6, 2016 by Leave a Comment
The public must shoulder their share of the blame for not warning Tony Blair that the Iraq war might be a bad idea according to the former Prime Minister.
Conservatives to choose between nearly as bad as Thatcher or slightly worse
July 5, 2016 by Leave a Comment
Swivel eyed loons at Conservative clubs throughout the country are preparing to choose a new despot, as the choice now appears to be between ‘nearly as mad as Thatcher’ and ‘quite a bit worse’.
Chilcot “I haven’t done the report”
July 4, 2016 by Leave a Comment
Sir John Chilcot has confessed today that those eagerly waiting to read his report on the Iraq War may be sorely disappointed. Because he hasn’t done it.
Ladbrokes stop taking bets on new Prime Minister being an arse-hat
July 2, 2016 by Leave a Comment
Ladbrokes have announced that from today they will not be taking any further bets on the new Prime Minister being an arse hat.
Prime Minister Gove to punish everyone
June 30, 2016 by Leave a Comment
Michael Gove has promised today that should he obtain the role of Prime Minister he will exact venomous revenge on all humankind rather than just singling out a particular minority to punish.
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