The news 'they' don't want you to hear. Because it isn't true.
Jeremy Corbyn will pass legislation that requires people to pay ten pounds every time they say yah, should he get into power. Speaking on the Andrew Marr show Mr Corbyn said “We’re mainly concerned with people in the city. Everyone will need to register their details and £10 will be debited from their account every […]
Andy Burnham has reportedly staged an armed coup of the Labour leadership, surrounding himself with trigger happy henchmen and claiming total control and leadership of the Labour party, according to news just in. In a televised message Mr Burnham said “I warned you I would do or say anything to get into power. It has […]
A new Government bill could give police powers to disperse groups of one unless they are wearing an arm band, a top hat, and have 14 forms of identification under proposed amendments to trade union laws announced today. Business Secretary Sajid Javid said ” It’s not enough for these people that we have more job […]
The forthcoming yes no in out EU referendum will show a photo of UKIP leader Nigel Farage with a simple question “Do you trust this twat?” according to a press release today by the elections watchdog. A spokesman for the watchdog told us “We haven’t made this decision lightly. We started with ‘Yes I don’t […]
The Government are today facing calls to rapidly increase immigration in order to dilute the gene pool of Daily Mail readers, Daily Express readers and UKIPPers, which continues to show no signs of breeding with anyone else apart from other like minded Caucasians with the same newspaper reading habits, often hailing from the same village. […]
Super rich arse-hat and former Sainsbury boss Justin King told today of his fury at a 50p an hour pay rise meaning many full time workers might be able to run amok paying bills and having enough to eat willy nilly. Mr King who trousered almost £2 million in his last year working for Sainsbury […]
Scotland should be able to decide what time it goes to bed at night free of diktats from Westminster, according to Scottish First Minister Nicola Sturgeon. Speaking at the Edinburgh Television Festival, Ms Sturgeon said that Scotland’s strict bed time routine orchestrated by Westminster politicians meant that many Scots, having had by law to get […]
Iain Duncan smith is a monumental cunt according to a new report released today by everyone else. Thought to be the case for some time amongst the chattering classes, the rumours have now been scientifically proved correct after a single drop of the work and Pensions Secretary’s blood was extracted and placed on litmus paper […]
Former Labour leader Neil Kinnock has described reports of him being banned from voting in the forthcoming Labour leadership contest as “a storm in a teacup”. “I don’t even care.” He confirmed. Mr Kinnock is understood to have failed a series of increasingly stringent tests designed to weed out people who might be voting to […]
Sir John Chilcott is planning to take a year off from the enquiry he is heading into the Iraq war, according to sources close to the laid back investigator. Having started it in 2009, Sir John has reportedly been considering widening his CV by perhaps going to work on a kibbutz or perhaps a ranch […]
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