The news 'they' don't want you to hear. Because it isn't true.
Chris Packham has today applauded moves to release a new strain of Gonorrhoea back into it’s natural habitat, starting with Yorkshire, where in days gone by it was considered as much a part of the region as cloth caps and Eccles cakes. Speaking from a camouflaged tent in Leeds city centre, along with Bill Oddie […]
The AA have confirmed that it is absolutely fine to put petrol in diesel cars should Britain run out of diesel in the next few months as widely predicted by the British media. Speaking on popular TV motor show Top Gear a spokesman for the AA explained “It’s the big secret that the motor industry […]
A Jeremy Corbyn led Labour Government will bring back analogue TV, returning Britain to a world where you change channels with a dial whilst someone else arses about with the aerial trying in vain to get a decent picture, according to stark warnings from David Cameron. In an impassioned speech the Prime Minister warned that […]
Jeremy Corbyn will pass legislation that requires people to pay ten pounds every time they say yah, should he get into power. Speaking on the Andrew Marr show Mr Corbyn said “We’re mainly concerned with people in the city. Everyone will need to register their details and £10 will be debited from their account every […]
Andy Burnham has reportedly staged an armed coup of the Labour leadership, surrounding himself with trigger happy henchmen and claiming total control and leadership of the Labour party, according to news just in. In a televised message Mr Burnham said “I warned you I would do or say anything to get into power. It has […]
Pope Francis has unveiled reforms intended to relax formerly strict Catholic rules on felching in a speech made today. Speaking to a heaving press conference outside the Vatican, his Holiness said “We don’t want to alienate half our flock who may at some time have had cause to engage in felching, perhaps through no fault […]
All immigrants in America must speak American, but not native American, according to former Governor of Alaska, and anti-recent immigration politician, Sarah Palin. Speaking to a large gathering of people waving flags and chanting ‘USA!’, Mrs Palin said “If you want to be in America, let’s speak American. None of that indigenous American from before […]
A new Government bill could give police powers to disperse groups of one unless they are wearing an arm band, a top hat, and have 14 forms of identification under proposed amendments to trade union laws announced today. Business Secretary Sajid Javid said ” It’s not enough for these people that we have more job […]
A former Costa coffee employee has said she is “heartbroken” following her dismissal from Costa coffee, a company that she loved working for so much that she had the company logo tattooed on her arm. A tearful Tracey Crapper from Burgess Hill told us “I loved everything about that job. I loved selling warm caffeinated drinks, marketed […]
The Government are today facing calls to rapidly increase immigration in order to dilute the gene pool of Daily Mail readers, Daily Express readers and UKIPPers, which continues to show no signs of breeding with anyone else apart from other like minded Caucasians with the same newspaper reading habits, often hailing from the same village. […]
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