The news 'they' don't want you to hear. Because it isn't true.
The fragile recovery of the British economy is said to be in danger unless project managers and their immediate superiors can find a way to stop talking in total gibberish according to a report released this morning. The report states that if unchecked a new breed of middle management may pass their entire career without […]
Formerly left wing journalist Owen Jones has confirmed that he will be accepting a full time position with the Daily Mail and has adopted right wing knee jerk political leanings in accordance with their standard policy. Mr Jones has said he will be looking forward to “exposing the nanny state” and battling against “political correctness […]
People who’ll never earn £150,000 a year have today vented their anger at Shadow Chancellor Eddie Balls who confirmed again today that a Labour Government would raise income tax to 50% for those earning over £150,000 per year. One protester told us “I don’t earn very much now but if I ever do I don’t […]
Supreme leader of the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea Kim Jong-un is believed to have ordered the total elimination of all uncles. The terrifying purge started straight after the execution of his own uncle Jan Sung-Taek and is said to be demonstrating the leader’s ‘decisiveness’. A spokesman from Pyonyang told us “The decision has nothing to […]
Much of the worlds population have put their differences aside today to plead for the release of teenage crooner Justin Bieber who is facing charges of abusing policemen, taking drugs and driving like a cunt. Protests throughout the western world ranged from a mass “go to bed for 8 hours followed by breakfast” to an […]
Pope Francis has heralded a much needed change in direction today as a senior Italian cleric has been charged with merely laundering millions through the Vatican bank, as opposed to instigating or attempting to cover up any sort of sexual assault. Monsignor Nunzio Scarano, who is already on trial and under house arrest on separate charges of plotting […]
Danny Alexander is likely to be the only remaining member of The Liberal Democratic Party by 2015 according to a leading political think tank entrusted to predict who exactly is going to be left in the Liberal Democratic party by 2015. In a statement released this morning, the think tank argues “We have reason to […]
Noel Edmonds is said to be in hiding today as the news that there actually isn’t any sort of system for winning his hit game show Deal or No Deal has gone viral. One previous contestant told us his shock at finding his whole ordeal of appearing on prime time television was in fact a […]
A UKIP councillor who blamed the recent storms and heavy floods across Britain on the Government’s decision to legalise gay marriage has suggested that God may have changed his mind as many parts of Britain enjoy a sunny day. Speaking at a hastily assembled press conference, Councillor David Silvester from Henley-on-Thames explained: “Obviously all the […]
Russian President Vladimir Putin has said homosexuals will be welcome in Sochi for the Winter Olympics but warned them against spreading “gay propaganda” by sledging, skiing or snowboarding in a gay way. Speaking to a team of volunteers this morning the premier explained “We respect the right of four gay men to climb into a […]
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