The news 'they' don't want you to hear. Because it isn't true.
Work and Pensions Secretary Iain Duncan smith is reportedly so excited about the possibility of Britain leaving the European Union that he has gone on ahead and left Europe already. A source close to the shiny headed inequality monger said “He was like a cat on a hot tin roof. The thought of living on […]
The ‘Brexit’ campaign has gained momentum this morning following the news that it has a staunch supporter and campaigner in Her Majesty the Queen. In a rare statement to the press, her Majesty said “People are coming over here just for the benefits. They think we’re a soft touch and they’re probably right. For example […]
David Cameron has convinced other European countries to start driving on the left, as part of a new deal in the EU that includes other member states having eggs and bacon for breakfast and speaking English amongst themselves. Beaming proudly, a victorious Mr Cameron said “We want Britain to stay in the EU as a […]
The Sun newspaper has devoted its front page this morning to the news that many moles are considering abandoning their life underground and looking to start a new life on the earth’s surface. In an abrupt editorial Editor Tony Gallagher said “If we let them up here we pave the way for ferrets, badgers and all […]
A family from Woking Surrey have told of their shock and disappointment after being refused social housing for being “too English”. Janet and John White say they were told in no uncertain terms that had they been born and grown up in a Mediterranean country then they would have had a far greater chance of […]
The heat is on the and time is right according to the campaign for Britain to stay in the European Union, who have this morning announced the appointment of none other than afternoon Euro quiz icon Henry Kelly as their leader. In his first press conference as a serious political figure Mr Kelly assured critics that […]
Former and now current UKIP leader Nigel Farage has told the British public that despite promises to the contrary he will not be pissing off out of the limelight, unless former Respect MP George Galloway does. Speaking to a heaving press conference, Mr Farage said “George isn’t pissing off because the people of Bradford west […]
The SNP have “Big plans for the Home Counties” and are fully prepared to discuss non-Scottish things with non-Scottish people should they hold the balance of power following the General Election on May 7th. SNP leader Nicola Sturgeon told a press conference that should she find herself as Deputy Prime Minister she would immerse herself […]
A Labour Government will put legislation into place to enable all workers to occasionally kick their boss up the arse without any risk of being fired or incurring criminal charges according to leader Ed Miliband. Speaking on the Marr show the shadow Prime Minister said “We still need to make difficult decisions in terms of […]
UKIP scientists have found a way back to the 1970s and may be leaving en masse in a big racist space ship come time machine, taking all their supporters with them according to leader Nigel Farage. Speaking to John Humphrys on Radio 4’s Today Programme Mr Farage explained “All we ever wanted is to go […]
News Toad 
You must be logged in to post a comment.